A Quote for Aspiring Writers

Being a writer does not necessarily mean being published. It's very nice to be published. It's what you want. When you have a vision, you want to share it. But being a writer means writing. It means building up a body of work. It means writing every day. You can hardly say that van Gogh was not a painter because he sold one painting during his lifetime, and that to his brother. But do you say that van Gogh wasn't a painter because he wasn't 'published'? He was a painter because he painted, because he held true to his vision as he saw it. And I think that's the best example I can give you.

-Madeleine L'Engle

10 Commandments for Writers

1. Love thy subject.

2. Love thy reader.

3. Love and thank and listen to and appreciate thy editor!

4. Thou shalt research thy subject and shalt knowest it better than thou knowest thyself (not really . . . every writer shalt knowest thyself darn well).

5. Thou shalt write because that's what writers do.

6. Thou shalt cry only briefly if thou receivest a rejection letter; and thou shalt celebrate each page your write.

7. Thou shalt worship the Word, not your words.

8. Thou shalt save thy work.

9. Thou shalt study thy markets diligently and only then send thy manuscript into the world.

10. Thou shalt not brood upon its fate, but set about the workings of thy next project with good will and high heart.

Wanna Be in the Next Miller & Mueller Book?

Writing Friends, it looks like there is a good chance that Miller and Mueller will be writing another book about friendship together. The working title is The Five Women You Can't Live Without. It's based on our Friendship Quiz and the material from our retreats, seminars, and conferences. We're currently writing sample chapters for our agent and a couple select publishers.

We'd be psyched if some of you would like to contribute to the book. How can you contribute?

Please take our Friendship Quiz(see below), then complete the following: I could not live with out my ____________ (fill in the blank with one of the following: Social Butterfly, Therapist, Giver, Soul Sister or Playmate) friend. And here's why . . .

If you decide to join us in this writing adventure please e-mail your contribution, pasted in the body of an e-mail, to sallymiller@ameritech.net. Or, if you'd like to post it to this blog entry, that'd be fine, too. Please include your full name (if you want us to use it, or let us know that you'd like to remain anonymous and we'll make up a name for you), your mailing address and, just for fun, let us know what your Friendship Style is, based on our quiz.

We can't promise you royalties (Lord knows we rarely get these ourselves). But, if the book gets picked up and we use your entry in the final draft, we'll send you a complimentary copy.

Thanks a million! We'll keep you posted; and we can't wait to hear from you!



The Five Friends Quiz
Circle one answer for each question (or two, if you can’t make up your mind). Go with your gut (or imagine what your friends might answer for you)! Don’t over-think. You’ll find instructions for compiling your results at the end of the quiz.

1) Do you tend to be more:
a) spiritual and organic
b) hilarious and thrill seeking
c) loyal and open-hearted
d) inviting and commemorative
e) wise and perceptive

2) A television show you’d most likely watch:
a) Saving Grace
b) The Comedy Channel
c) A Hallmark made-for-TV movie
d) Giada at Home (on the Food Network)
e) Dr. Drew’s Celebrity Rehab

3) At a party, do you....
a) remind the hostess to ‘just breathe’
b) show up in costume
c) help remove a red wine stain from a friend’s white blouce
d) critique the wine/food pairing
e) secretly diagnose everyone’s issues (including your own)

4) Which famous person is most like you?
a) Maya Angelou
b) Ellen
c) Jennifer Aniston
d) Martha Stewart
e) Oprah

5) What might you be overheard saying?
a) “Everything happens for a reason.”
b) “Why did the chicken cross the road?”
c) “You go, Girl!”
d) “Can I borrow your bundt pan?”
e) “Now, the tornado in your dream means . . .”

6) What vacation would you most enjoy?
a) taking respite at a mind/body/spirit spa
b) joining the circus for ten days
c) going to Africa and volunteering at an AIDS clinic
d) inviting your friends to join you for a weekend at a cozy B & B
e) attending a Dream Workshop

7) What your friends might say about you:
a) “Even when everybody is freaking out; she always seems so centered.”
b) “She makes me laugh so hard I pee my pants.”
c) “When I’m bummed out, she brings Ben & Jerry’s and Kleenex (for both
of us).”
d) “She feels like family.”
e) “She knows me better than I know myself.”

8) If you were a best seller, what would your title be?
a) Keeping Faith by Jodi Piccoult
b) Belly Laughs by Jenny McCarthy
c) Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert
d) Real Life Entertaining: Easy Recipes and Unconventional Wisdom by
Jennifer Rubell
e) Woman Power: Transform You Man, Your Marriage, Your Life by
Dr. Laura Schlessinger

9) How you might spend a Saturday afternoon:
a) meditating, doing yoga, or hugging a tree
b) taking a belly dancing class just for kicks
c) volunteering at a homeless shelter
d) reorganizing the living room in perfect Feng Shui
e) writing in your gratitude journal

10) The song title that describes your best quality:
a) Soul by Seal
b) Carnival Ride by Carrie Underwood
c) Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis
d) Home by Daughtry
e) Intuition by Jamie Fox

Finding Friendship Style:
Tally your number of a, b, c, d and e answers in the spaces provided here. Your Friendship Style is based on your two highest scores. Read both descriptions on the Rap Sheet below; you're a combo of the two different types.

a______ b______ c______ d_______ e_______


Five Friendship Styles
A Rap Sheet

(a) The Soul Sister: the one who sees magic in every day life.
You’re spiritually sensitive and in tune with the numinous. Because you live a deeply centered life - rooted in a divine dimension - you encourage your friends to be enlarged on their own faith journeys. You’re always honest and transparent about your life; so women come to you for guidance and words that buoy or shed a lasting perspective on temporary issues. At times you may get sick-and-tired of always being the anchor in your circle of friends. It’s worth it, though, 'cause they don’t know what they’d do without your spirit of strength.

(b) The Playmate: the friend whose entrance makes you feel like the party has just begun.
You have a knack for finding humor in the ordinary. Friends call you when they need a good laugh. You spark up any gathering with your witty comments and prankster personality. Because you can be tender at heart, it may be hard for you to trust others with your deepest feelings. Your sense of adventure inspires people to do things they might not otherwise do. The way you help others play is invaluable. You get it – on a soulful level – that laughter is the best medicine.

(c) The Giver: a woman who wears her heart on her sleeve even though it’s the size of Texas.
You’re a compassionate and generous friend. Others feel comfortable coming to you when they need a helping hand or a shoulder to cry on. Patience and understanding come easily to you. Friends might accuse you of being overly sentimental (even sappy). If you don’t take care of yourself, you might often become depleted from giving so freely of your time and resources. You have an uncanny knack for figuring out hit-the-spot ways to nurture those in need.

(d) The Social Butterfly: the one who finds any excuse to pop a cork (whether it’s a job promotion or Revlon’s release of a new lipstick).
You are creative, fun, and often the planner of parties. You always keep tabs on the goings on in the lives of women closest to you. Everybody feels at home when they’re around you. You know how to celebrate your friends, and enjoy marking meaningful moments like births, deaths, new love interests, job promotions, etc. It can be easy for you to get stuck in high gear, though, unable to find solitude for yourself. Friends appreciate your creativity, and often look to you to coordinate the next meaningful get-together, group vacation or party.

(e) The Therapist: the girlfriend who saves you thousand of dollars in therapy bills.
You’re a wise and perceptive friend, obsessed with finding meaning in life. You have valuable insights that others might miss on their own. People crave your perspective on life and love, and often come to you for advice. Friends may need to remind you of your tendency to over-analyze. Journaling, reading and reflecting help strengthen your abilities of insight and perception. Your friends benefit because you often know them better than they know themselves.


We hope you had a blast taking the quiz; and that you shared it with a friend or two. Thanks again! We'll look forward to hearing from you.

10 Ways to Procrastinate When You're Writing for a Deadline

Sally was elbow deep in marinara at 6:30 in the morning when she realized how absurd it was that she'd decided to make several pans of lasagna before getting the kids off to school. The insanity of it all got her thinking, Why am I chopping garlic while even the sun is still sacked out?

A familiar maniacal, malevolent little voice whispered, “You’re procrastinating again!” That’s when she started making a list, a list of all the ways she procrastinates when she's writing for a deadline.

We all have surreptitious distractions. We - The Sometimes Procrastinating Word Girls - would love it if you shared some of yours with us. Make a list (it’s actually another great way to procrastinate if you’re writing for a deadline, too).

Here’s Sally's:

YOU KNOW YOU’RE WRITING FOR A DEADLINE WHEN

1. You decide to make pans of lasagna for the entire neighborhood; and actually like the smell of garlic that has infused all of the curtains in your house.

2. You write the thirty best poems you’ve ever written in your life (and you’re not working on a poetry compilation).

3. You visit every possible writing website in existence, print out articles, read them and try to convince yourself that you're in the process of 'feeding yourself a sustaining inspirational meal-of-words.'

4. You get excited when you hear the buzzer go off on the drier, coffee maker, or the stove . . . when the doorbell rings, the mail arrives, or your most obnoxious neighbor stops over for coffee.(If any of my neighbors are reading this . . . I'm not talking about YOU!)

5. You talk to your friend on the phone for four hours, analyzing a dream she had about Steven King, an auburn horse and the End Times.

6. You blog, you respond to all of your old e-mails, you check your e-mail (again). You read your friends' blogs. You check your e-mail (again). You respond to new e-mails. You check your e-mail (again and again and again and again).

7. You find Oprah particularly sagacious in an interview she’s conducting with Jim Carrey. As you watch, you’re rapt and convince yourself that this show is part of your research/incubating/character blah, blah, blah and that the exact nugget you need for your plot will probably come from this consequential hour of TV.

8. You actually look forward to exercising. Cher and Richard Simmons tapes from the 80’s are inspiring you to lose the 10 pounds you gained while eating chocolate donuts and writing the first half of your book.

9. You are awakened by wolves howling in the night. When you fall asleep you dream that your editor has grown excessive amounts of facial hair and is howling at the moon, chasing you, growling and asking where your manuscript is.

10. You take up knitting, take a trip, take your time when you walk the dog.

11. You decide to organize every closet in your house, make plans for a kitchen remodel and order seeds for the garden you’ve always dreamed of planting.

12. You make a list called YOU KNOW YOU’RE WRITING FOR A DEADLINE WHEN . . . and submit it to your favorite writing magazine.

13. You break into an anxiety induced sweat, finally put your butt in a chair, and start writing. Keys start clicking, kinks in your cerebellum unravel, words begin to flow like faucet water. You’re actually enjoying yourself, you're on a roll, when . . . your three-year-old enters your office and asks you to play!

Writers Write: A Gentle Rebuttal

How many times have you read an article or attended a writers’ conference and heard the piquant slogan, ‘writers write!’? How does this often used ditty make you feel? If you’re anything like me, it can make you a little sweaty on your upper lip. It can cause guilt to turn your stomach like soured milk. It can make you wonder why you took time to clear the lint out of your drier, visit Grandma at the home, or read that piece of pulp fiction you picked up at your neighbor’s garage sale.

A Reaction to Writers Write
Writers write. It’s true. But, why does that phrase potentially cause so much angst, so much guilt? Perhaps it’s because the phrase is commonly paired with the following Isaac Asimov quote: “Whenever I have endured or accomplished some difficult task – such as watching television, going out socially, or sleeping – I always look forward to rewarding myself with the small pleasure of getting back to my typewriter and writing something. This enables me to store up enough strength to endure the next interruption.” This first time I encountered Asimov’s quote it was mind-blowing, quirky and inspiring. It made me wonder why I ever watched Grey’s Anatomy, why I ever took naps, why I wasted time at my husband’s workplace Christmas party.

The longer I contemplate Asimov’s words, though, the more they make me wonder if I’m cut out for life as a writer. If I’m really a writer, why do I wrestle with God and my sheets every morning when the blasted alarm beckons me to my computer to meet a deadline or write that perennial column? If I’m really a writer why do I prefer coffee clutches with Margie or a phone conversations with Cher to editing that weed-infested piece of plot in my YA novel? If I’m really a writer why do I look forward to those quintessential, yet cliché moments on The Bachelor: After the Final Rose?

Everyday Writers Defined . . .
Lately I’ve been realizing that the writers write line cannot – will not – define me. The problem with the phrase, what actually seems to bug me about it, are the connotations it espouses. It seems to nefariously whisper, writers write all the time (they don’t do much of anything else; and if they do, they should be longing to write instead). When the connotations and implications of this tag phrase are spelled out like this, they seem slightly crazed, graceless and indicative of a workaholic lifestyle that may have suited brilliant prolific Isaac. But, it’s definitely not for everyday writers like me. Writers like me definitely write. We also make love, make dinner, and try to make ends meat. We write and we live. We live and we write.

We are writers (even when we’re not writing). If we live in the truth of that, we free ourselves from this mixed up notion that writers write (all the time). We realize that our lives and days are full of seasons and callings that overlap with and intersect into our call to write. Perhaps we’re writers. But, we’re also puppy raisers, kid raisers, wives and beach combers, crazy aunts, worshippers, and friends. This cornucopia of differing hats makes our writing life and our writing richer, more informed, organic and embodied.

Maybe we just need a new paradigm to frame the writing experience, a fresh and true and freeing phrase. This new paradigm should not be an excuse to slack in discipline, to roll over in bed when a deadline is due. It should not be carte blanche to tuck Writing Group editorial notes away and never rework menacing manuscripts. And, it should not be a Get Out of Jail Free Card when an editor finally bites on a query and requests sample chapters (that have yet to be written).

This new paradigm should give writers freedom and guiltless space to live full and vibrant lives: abundant lives. Never again should we feel guilty that we shopped for jeans to make impossible butts look cute, instead of writing. Never again should we feel guilty for taking a vacation, being a friend, burying a loved one, watching a sunset, snuggling our kids, going to seminary, going to the gym, or enjoying a good cup of dark roast instead of writing.

Never again should we feel guilty about ‘wasting’ a morning watching Oprah (one of my best book ideas actually came from an O episode, by the way) instead of writing. Instead, we should fill our lives with the fullness of living, and come to our work as writers with the kind of delight in the writing process that Isaac Asimov must’ve viscerally known.

A New Paradigm
When I imagine a quote offering a fresh paradigm for the writing life, I think of Natalie Goldberg’s, Writers live twice . . . from Writing the Bones. She offers, "Writers live twice. They go along with their regular life, are as fast as anyone in the grocery store, crossing the street, getting dressed for work in the morning. But there's another part of them that they have been training. The one that lives everything a second time. That sits down and sees their life again and goes over it. Looks at the texture and the details."

Perhaps this phrase will be adopted as a new paradigm for writers. Perhaps it will espouse hope in writers, like me, who have full and messy lives. Perhaps it will free writers to write as a means of enriching their lives, of living it twice. And, perhaps, it will reveal that those who live life fully and deeply – present to each moment – have more to write about.
Writers often wear many hats, juggle many plates, multitask with the best of them. Just think. Elizabeth Gilberty would never have had the NY Times best-selling smash, Eat, Pray, Love if she had never eaten, prayed or loved deeply. Madeleine L’Engle wouldn’t have written my favorite book, Circle of Quiet if she hadn’t taken time to be, to know ontology, to stop frenetically writing for periods of time.

If we listen to another renowned, prolific and world-changing writer, who penned: “Never compare yourselves with others. Only compare yourself to yourself.” We will be free to let go of Asimov whispers and realize that the writing life is a seasonal journey just like every other path we walk. Sometimes writers are crazed with an idea that won’t let them sleep and have butt in chair for eighteen hours a day. Other times, we feel dazed by rejection and need to take a break, take a walk, take a sabbatical, take a long drink of cold cold water. Yes, writers write. But, writers also loiter and read and sing and play and cook and live twice, too.

"Writers live twice. They go along with their regular life, are as fast as anyone in the grocery store, crossing the street, getting dressed for work in the morning. But there's another part of them that they have been training. The one that lives everything a second time. That sits down and sees their life again and goes over it. Looks at the texture and the details."

- Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg

You Can't Bore People

I was reading a magazine the other day on a flight to California. One of the contributing writers, Michael Cunningham, Winner of the Pulitzer Prize and PEN/Faulkner Award, wrote,

"Telling a good story is always hard - - it's a funny combination of creativity and puzzle solving."

Later, he adds that the one fundamental principle that guides his writing is that, "You can't bore people - - ever. I'm always aware that I'm writing for someone at least as smart as I am, who is busy and has a job, and a mate, and a whole life going on. You have to give them something you believe is worth their time."

The Word Girls heartily agree with Cunningham. So, in a nutshell:

1. Be creative when storytelling. Approach it like you do a puzzle.

2. Never bore your reader.

3. Write about something you believe in.

Five Writing Secrets

Over the weeekend The Word Girls consulted with a burgeoning author. During our impassioned, creative conversation with her, Five Writing Secrets emerged. We share them here - with you - as a gift! We hope they will help you, Writer Friend, as you hone your craft and continue on the writing journey.

1.

Include sensory details.

Whether you're writing fiction or nonfiction, always ask yourself, What do I want the reader to see, hear, feel, smell, experience? Sensory writing will draw in your readers and vivify your work.

2.
Honor your voice.

Remember that YOU are the one writing your book. No one else can tell your story with the particular tone, pace, rhythm, details and slant that YOU can. Never write what you anticipate the reader wants or expects you to write. Dig deeply into the soil of your soul and write exactly what you feel, think, believe, perceive. Your particular slant on a subject is what makes it interesting, saleable, worth-while, intriguing and unique.

3.

Include details instead of assuming the reader will 'get' it.

It is dangerous to assume that your readers will make a conclusion or connection that seems obvious & unmistakable to you. Sketchy sentences or sometimes even an elusive paragraph of ideas can sometimes leave a reader in the dark. Take the time to unpack, describe, explain, delve into concepts or thematic elements that are quintessential to your story.

4.

Take your time.

The publishing world moves at glacial speed. So, try not to worry or impose false deadlines on yourself. Sit with your ideas. Walk with them. Give them space to live and move and breathe. Give yourself time to write and revise and bring your manuscript to its brightest best before you submit it to an editor.

5.
Seek Advice from experienced writers.

We know it can feel intimidating, scary, even diariaha-producing to have other writers reader your work. But, we strongly suggest that you do! You'll be surprised what a fresh pair of educated, trained,experienced eyes can offer your work. When you share your pieces with other writers they'll offer encouragement, editorial suggestions, and perhaps even well-researched and informed ideas for where to submit your work.

All of these reasons are why we developed The Word Girls Writing Studio. So, if you're yearning for mentorship and guidance from a couple of writers who've experienced gut-wrenching rejections as well as heart-palpitating publishing successes over the last decade, then we welcome you to visit our Writing Studio: www.thewordgirls.com. Blessings on your writing journey, Writing Friend!